From the Rector

Dear Friends,

In this issue focusing on ministry to those who are being married, I want to say something about the role of the wedding homily. The Prayer Book allows for a homily to be preached at weddings or funerals, but it does not mandate it. (As to the difference between a sermon and a homily, some would say, “About ten or fifteen minutes!” In Prayer Book usage, however, “homily” tends to be used for special occasions like a wedding or a funeral.) Not all clergy always choose this option, but I invariably do for several reasons.

The first is that each wedding is a special time. It marks a momentous occasion when this man and this woman in response to God's grace vow themselves to one another in God's name until death parts them. In the presence of God and the community they seek God's blessing on their union, and indeed it is God who joins them together. While the liturgy of The Book of Common Prayer evokes a powerful sense of that sacred reality, the homily can also help to make that sacred mystery present in the midst of this specific congregation, gathered this one time for this unique occasion. The Rev. David Schlaffer in his book, What Makes This Day Special? Preaching Grace on Special Occasions, asserts “It is primarily in the sermon that those gathered will be pointed toward the mercy of God that is newly present on this particular day.”

The second reason and closely related to it, is that people tend to come to weddings (and funerals) with their hearts already open. Having a special relationship to the principals involved, they are already engaged in the deeper dimensions of the mystery of life and ready to hear it articulated in light of the Christian faith. Whether they attend church regularly or rarely darken the door, they present the preacher with a uniquely fruitful opportunity to proclaim the Gospel and connect it with people's lives. (It is roughly parallel to the depth of pastoral conversation almost immediately available with a patient in the hospital as compared to the ordinary level of discourse possible at the church door on Sunday.) A word aptly spoken on a special occasion is even more likely to remain close to the listener's consciousness than one from the regular routine of the liturgical year.

The third reason is that, frequently on such occasions, there is a story that cries out to be told and related to the Christian story or questions that are ruminating in people's minds: How can this marriage deepen and flourish in the midst of our society's values? Can this love prevail, especially in the face of different cultures or precarious health or different faiths? How can the Church be participating in this remarriage (after divorce)? What challenges face this newly blended family (of several children)? An attentive preacher can often speak fitting words of hope or joy or forgiveness.

I count preaching at weddings and other special occasions such as ordinations and funerals among the greatest of privileges of ordained ministry. To be entrusted with the sacred task of articulating the mystery of God at work among us, especially at major turning points of individuals' lives, is a humbling honor and a life-giving challenge. I hope that here at the Chapel of the Cross those who gather as congregations for these unique occasions find their faith nourished and their vision widened.

- Stephen